


Sister Support

by WeirdDaydreamingFangirl



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cersei X Wine should probably be the main tag of this fic though, Cersei is still a bitch though, Crack, F/M, Humor, No Twincest, Sibling Banter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-03-18 08:23:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13677930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeirdDaydreamingFangirl/pseuds/WeirdDaydreamingFangirl
Summary: But she already tried using even worse means to kick him away from the top spot of Tywin’s favorite child and Tywin threatened that if Cersei played tattletale like a preschooler on her brothers again, she will hold no position in the company. So maybe being in her twin’s good graces would be more favorable to her.A.K.A. Modern AU where Cersei is just Jaime's bitchy older sister begrudgingly helping him out when troubles involving the love of his life, Brienne, arises.





	1. The Wingman

**Author's Note:**

> By (not really that popular) demand, this shall be a miniseries and here's the interesting part *gulp* you can leave prompts if you have a request related to the general theme of this series. I make no promises and I'm still not very good but I shall try my best.
> 
> I just reposted this first chapter to get you an idea of what the overall theme of this series is but you've probably read this in my drabble collection already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by this meme:  
> 
> 
> Link to original post [HERE](https://web.facebook.com/NCWEmmy/photos/a.273743962765034.1073741834.272957046177059/1039097339563022/?type=3&theater)

Cersei kept telling herself that she was only doing this—walking through this smelly old bar and helping her pathetic twin brother out—because maybe their father would at least promote her to a higher position in the family company. She lost all hope in getting the topmost positions which both her brothers occupy. Their father thinks she’s too stupid, even thinking her current position was already him being too generous.  _As if._  Their father was just an old fashioned misogynist and didn’t believe a woman could lead. But this could be Cersei’s last shot at a promotion at least. She certainly was  _not_  doing this freely for their father’s favorite and also most disobedient son. Besides, Jaime had begged and pleaded that she was his last resort because apparently his only two friends and Tyrion were busy. Cersei quite enjoyed her brother’s groveling.

“Excuse me,” Cersei said, tapping a broad shoulder and the owner of said shoulder immediately turned around. Cersei tried her hardest not to grimace in disgust as soon as she saw the face. The blonde woman looked more like a man, maybe except for her eyes. They looked like a stupid gullible girl’s eyes. Maybe it wouldn’t be too hard.

“What?” the woman spat when she saw Cersei. She couldn’t believe that ugly excuse of the female specimen had the gall to scowl at her as if Cersei was the ugly one. But Cersei, thinking of the promotion, sucked it up and smiled.

“My brother thinks you’re hot,” Cersei vomited those words out. It suddenly occurred to her she had no idea how to be a wingman but she’d never surrounded herself with ugly people. Even that Imp, Tyrion, was charming. Although, likely it was his name, money, and position that’s charming. This should be easy.

“If your brother looks anything like you, this is probably all a joke,” the woman replied drily. As Cersei thought about how this beast of a woman should count herself lucky she got her brother’s attention, the beast was studying her. “Wait. You look familiar. Your brother is?”

Cersei pointed to a booth in a corner where Jaime sat.

To her utter mortification, Jaime was doing what she believed was a ‘smoulder’ and doing a ridiculous dance that Cersei was certain would make Tywin disown him due to public tomfoolery.

But she already tried using even worse means to kick him away from the top spot of Tywin’s favorite child and Tywin threatened that if Cersei  _played tattletale like a preschooler_  on her brothers again, she will hold no position in the company. So maybe being in her twin’s good graces would be more favorable to her. Besides, Jaime was thirty-three, unwed, and very picky with women. Tywin had been urging him to marry so he can have grandchildren as heirs to the company, as if her Joffrey didn’t exist.

“You?!” the large woman yelled at her brother. Never had Cersei seen someone look at Jaime with such vehemence. Frustration and annoyance probably but not this deadly cutting glare. For the hundredth time today, she wondered why her brother would be interested in this…  _cow_.

“I’m sorry. You two have met?” Cersei said, looking at her.

“He tried claiming ownership to a public parking space,” the woman hissed, not taking her glaring eyes off Jaime. “Even shoving money at me, saying he’s an important CEO of the company and he’s running late for something important. It doesn’t matter if he’s the president of Westeros _. I_ took that spot first and there’s no indication that spot is reserved for  _him_.”

Cersei gritted her teeth. That should be  _her_  throwing out her position if her father would give her what’s rightfully hers. Instead she had to settle with sleeping with gross douchebags, like her ex-husband, Robert.

“But don’t you think he’s cute at least?” Cersei tried. If father hadn’t pushed Jaime to marriage in the last decade, he should at least be pleased Cersei helped in convincing her brother, even if his chosen bride looked more like Frankenstein than his bride.

Cersei’s gaze turned back to Jaime and he’s still doing that stupid dance.  _Is this the CEO of Casterly Inc. that you envisioned, father?_

“W-well…” Cersei turned back to the woman. Her face appeared darker and her pupils were taking over her blue eyes, conveying very familiar desire. Inwardly, Cersei rejoiced.  _Promotion here I come._

But then the woman stormed away from her and headed outside, without even a goodbye.  _Rude_.

Jaime, pathetically sad, followed the woman outside.

Cersei just sighed. She sat on the bar stool, her mind set on a strong Dornish wine brand that should get her hammered enough to forget that she’s saying goodbye to any chance of a promotion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up is the Valentine's special!


	2. The Chauffeur

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we have the Valentine's special I quickly wrote to give you more ideas on what I envision this series to be.
> 
> Unbeta'd and a quickie. ;D

Cersei _hated_ driving but she hadn’t found a replacement since she’d fired the third driver she hired this week. Family or not, Lancel was an incompetent idiot who scratched her brand new Balerion. His excuses of a boar suddenly attacking him when he was about to enter the car was probably a lie. He even went so far as to injure himself. As if she was an idiot to fall for that.

And that was how Cersei ended up driving herself today.

Seeing an opening on the road, Cersei stepped on the gas pedal, ready to leave the parking lot of the company who had been holding back her talents, when something slammed in her window. She hit the breaks in surprise.

If she didn’t see the suit, Cersei would have thought him a hobo but she unfortunately knew who the rascal was.

Said rascal was now knocking on her window with his prosthetic hand and called her name. She pressed a button to open the windows to scowl angrily at the intruder.

“What is it, Jaime?” Cersei spat, taking in his smile of relief. Her scowl deepened at seeing his stupid hobo beard up close.

“I know this is a bit last minute but I need your help right now.”

…….

Of all days Jaime had rotten luck, it just had to be on Maiden’s Day, the day where, ironically, actual maidens stopped becoming one. It was the first Maiden’s Day him and his girlfriend were celebrating as an official couple. He'd been so distracted in the office, being a fussy mother and making sure everything was ready, but as he was leaving the parking lot, his car broke down. His only two friends (one of them is his actual driver Bronn) and Tyrion all left early for some quality time with their significant others. Cersei swallowed the bitterness she felt that the Imp had a girlfriend who actually liked him while she, the beautiful and brilliant Cersei Lannister, was all alone. Joffrey and Tommen were in a boarding school in the Stormlands while Myrcella was in Dorne so she was planning to spend her Maiden’s Day drinking.

Apparently, her twin thought it was a good enough reason to become his driver and she would have left him for saying that had he not thrown himself at the front of the car and pressed his sweaty cheek against the windshield.

And now her car wasn’t only filled with Jaime’s nervous sweat but also of the stuff he picked up on the way—winter roses and a large heart-shaped box of chocolates. Those two, alone, took up the backseat while Jaime rode shotgun.

“Thank you for helping out your crippled brother, sweet sister.”

 _You should thank me for deciding not to run you over earlier_ , she wanted to say and part of her still wanted to do it but their father thinking she tried to kill his precious heir to depose him (instead of doing it out of sheer spite) just wouldn’t do.

“You owe me,” she said, trying to push her luck, but Jaime frowned. That frown was almost welcomed after his constant dopey smile.

“If this is about getting promoted, you can forget about it. Even if I wanted to, father still controls the company.”

Cersei huffed as she took one last turn to reach Jaime’s last pick-up. She stopped in front of the third house on the street and Jaime immediately went out.

“Stay here,” Jaime instructed as he took the humongous blue flower arrangement from the backseat. Cersei just sat back and amusingly watched her brother struggle with carrying it. She didn’t even get why he had to go over the top with the flowers when his girlfriend’s face could wilt flowers. But this was another rule Tywin enforced on her. She couldn’t insult Jaime’s girlfriend to her face. And also to Jaime’s face but it was an unspoken rule because last time she did so… well, needless to say, his threats actually scared her. Sometimes, she still checks her wine cellar if her bottles are still intact.

Jaime jogged back to the car to take out the chocolates. With the way Jaime was holding that large box, a small breeze could topple it over.

As predicted, Jaime tripped in one of the porch steps and the box flew from his grasp. The box went flying, its contents scattering everywhere in the porch. Cersei couldn’t stop the laugh that escaped her lips as profanity escaped out of her brother’s.

And her laugh stopped when the front door open and out stepped her brother’s behemoth girlfriend—if you could call that a girl. She was wearing a pretty blue dress that did nothing to make the wearer pretty. She’s still looked like a sow in silk despite the effort she made in taming her hair and putting on eyeliner but for some reason, Jaime liked it…a lot. Then again, Jaime always insisted she wore something short and for some reason, heels—as if she wasn’t already taller than him, and it made her legs actually feminine.

The woman looked perplexed as Jaime stood nervously before her. Even from afar, Cersei could make out the chocolate ball sitting atop his head. The woman, then, surveyed the state of her porch. Upon seeing the flowers, she bowed her head. Cersei would bet her expensive Dornish wine collection that she was blushing. Then to her surprise, the woman _laughed_! Jaime’s girlfriend was not a very talkative person and the most she gave were small strained smiles but right now, she was showing off her buck teeth framed by her swollen lips. She still laughed even as she plucked the chocolate on Jaime's head. Her brother crossed his arms and hunched his shoulders, pouting probably, but this only seemed to amuse the woman. She did stop laughing, but the grin on her face and the flaring of her nostrils indicated that it took a lot of effort to do so.

Cersei, then, looked away when the woman’s arms were wrapped around her brother’s neck. She was already too familiar with their public displays of affection. She’d seen enough of it. Cersei was honestly surprised at how enthralled her brother had been with that woman. She thought that Jaime only wanted her for the thrill of the exotic and then drop her like a hot potato once he fucker her but to her surprise, he’d pursued the woman and grew even more pathetically soft during his courting stages. Over a year of courting and she finally said yes and they’ve been together a few months now. She confronted Tywin, saying that she helped Jaime but their father had the same thought as Cersei, they probably wouldn’t last long.

At least for her efforts, Tywin gave her that vintage bottle from the Summer Isles that she’d been searching for so long.

The sound of a door slamming close pulled Cersei from her thoughts. Were they seriously going to leave her outside for a quickie? _The nerve!_ She was about to leave Jaime and his beast girlfriend when she heard the door opened once more and the girlfriend was the one pulling Jaime to the car. Even ugly mannish women can be… _insistent_ girlfriend, Cersei supposed.

As if Jaime were some actual gentleman or fairytale prince charming, he opened the backseat door and let his girlfriend enter first while she went on about something about him helping with cleaning her porch later. Through the rear view mirror, Cersei looked at the smiling blushing beast sliding deeper inside to make room for Jaime.

“Oh stop pouting,” Jaime’s girlfriend teased, in a very _flirty_ way Cersei didn’t believe her capable of. “Your  _chauffeur_  is probably going to spend his Maiden's Day somewhere, too. Right, Br—oh…”

Cersei smirked at her through the mirror as Jaime followed inside.

“I’m really having _that_ bad a day,” her brother muttered.

His girlfriend said nothing at that, thankfully.

“I have half a mind to kick you both out of this car,” Cersei growled as she started the engine.

“You know very well Brienne and I can kick _you_ out if you try,” Jaime shot back. Oh Cersei was tempted to try even if they will very well succeed but Cersei was already pulling away.

“Jaime, don’t.” his girlfriend, Brienne, commanded. _Commanded._ Nobody really ever commanded Jaime to do anything. Not even Tywin managed that… not well at least. But he could hear Jaime’s resigned huff from the back and the drive was thankfully silent.

At least for a while.

At some point, she could hear some commotion at the back and then a girlish squeak.

“Stop that!” Brienne chided.

“Stop what, darling?” Jaime replied, followed by a strangled moan.

“Jaime, this isn't like your limo with the screen blocker. And your _sister_ is in the car!”

“So? Her eyes will be on the road all the time isn’t it, sis?”

Cersei growled. “Don’t you fucking dare even grope each other in _my_ car.”

And it tempered them for a while and then she could hear a groan. Cersei risked looking at the mirror and clear as day, she could see Jaime was groping his girlfriend’s _tits_ , for a lack of better word for her flat chest and he was sporting a massive boner.

She swerved the car in surprise, her passengers not ready for the force squishing them to one side. She, then, parked her car to the side.

“Get the fuck out of the car!” Cersei yelled.

“What the fuck!” Jaime shouted back. “I was groping her through her dress. Brienne was _not_ naked.”

“Knowing your lack of self-control, we all know she’s going to be. Now, get.out.”

“But my _pants_ are in a state!”

“Oh I don’t fucking care if you jerk off in public. Besides, your restaurant is a block away. If you’re strong enough to kick me out of a car or fuck standing up, you should be able to handle walking one _fucking_ block.”

Jaime appeared ready for a slashing retort but his girlfriend was tugging his arm insistently.

“Hey, Jaime. It’s okay. I know you’re having a bad day but let’s just have a nice dinner, okay? We can still make the rest of this day nice,” she told him in a surprisingly soft tone and gave him a little smile that did little to better her looks but it seemed to charm Jaime anyway because he relaxed a little.

“Alright, Brienne. Does this mean I can stay over tonight?” he whimpered but his lips were leering suggestively at Brienne. Unsurprisingly, it worked because Brienne was blushing hard. Cersei wanted to roll her eyes at these two.

“I-I suppose it’s fine,” Brienne answered very daintily and Jaime laughed, kissing his girlfriend quickly.

“Will you two finally get out?” Cersei hissed through gritted teeth.

Jaime’s mood soured once more and glared at her. Brienne who was on the side of the sidewalk quickly opened the door, stammering a polite thank you to Cersei. Jaime followed his girlfriend’s example, despite the glare he gave Cersei as he thanked her.

“Don’t call me to pick you up later!” Cersei warned when Jaime just closed the door but he must’ve still heard it because he flipped her off.

Cersei glimpsed the couple walking away, holding hands and smiling besottedly at each other. _Yuck._

At least Cersei is heading home and be together with the only thing that had always been there for her.

_Vintage Summerwine here I come!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geez Jaime there is such thing as discretion. You know Brienne will always want to fuck you. XD
> 
> Also, I know little to nothing about wines so if you could give me wine ideas next time please that would be great because Cersei X Wine is the real ship in this series.


	3. The Mother

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> december13 asked: Also, prompt? You wrote, darling, "over a year of courting"! I needzzz to know about courting. **About Brienne saying "no". About Jaime looking like an idiot in his attempts at courting. About Cersei being pissed off as hell! Needzzz it...**
> 
> December's prompt that would be focused on this installation is the highlight part. Mostly on Brienne saying no, though I didn't elaborate on what happens because this is a Cersei POV fic and you know how Cersei really isn't a good listener. No courting at this point also. If my muses fancy something, I might get back on that courting bit later. Jaime looking like an idiot and Cersei being pissed off is always a given in this fic ;)
> 
> This fic happens a week after "The Wingman" (I'll update sequences of the stories at the super end notes)
> 
> The usual: Unbeta'd. All mistakes are mine.

“ _It’s been a week, Cers_ ,” Tyrion sighed over the phone. “ _He’s gone too quiet. He wouldn’t even respond to my honeycomb and jackass joke. It always makes him laugh_.”

Cersei had to roll her eyes at the Imp’s worry. “Just be glad he’s actually working or dad would’ve fired his ass already.”

Her little brother had the gall to snort. “ _And make you CEO? In your dreams. If I’m not getting it, you’re not either_.”

Cersei flared her nostrils. “Fine. If you’re just going to ins—”

“ _Wait. Wait. Cers_ ,” Tyrion begged as she was pulling away the phone. Their desperation always makes her happy. “ _Just… check up on him tonight. I was going to do that myself but there's a last minute meeting and I have to fly to Essos as soon as possible. The ‘Mother of Dragons’ does not appreciate people being_ _late_." Daenerys Targaryen. Ugh. Cersei hated that bitch. Why did she hold such a high position at such a young age but Cersei _couldn't_. " _You’re still his_ _twin._ " Tyrion said, snapping her out of her thoughts of burning the so-called 'Mother of Dragons'." _And I trust you won’t murder him because dad will suspect you first after all._ ”

“Fine,” she resigned. “Just tonight.”

“ _Thanks. Love you_.” Tyrion even made kissing noises which made Cersei want to gag.

“Wish I could say the same about you,” she replied before putting down the phone.

…….

_1… 2… 3…_

And Jaime’s door was reduced to splinters, the doorknob hanging in a weird angle. Cersei would have it replaced tomorrow.

“Thank you, Gregor. You can wait for me in the car.”

The Lannister bodyguard nodded silently before leaving. Jaime wasn’t answering her calls and while his security system let her in easily without raising an alarm, he still used some ordinary locks that even she can’t bypass so she needed the extra muscle to let herself inside.

Jaime was into a minimalist style with whites and blacks with lots of metal and wood but she could barely see that in the darkness. Well, mostly dark. There was an erratic light coming from the living room and sounds of two people conversing—neither voice sounded like her brother but she entered anyway.

She huffed at the state of the room. Contrary to popular belief, Jaime was actually a tidy person, not a neat freak by any means, but he barely kept possessions as opposed to their richly decorated childhood mansion that he could easily maintain his space. But at that moment, his living area looked like a tornado tore up the place. Bottles and wrappers of junk food and takeout littered all over the place. The closer she got to the couch, the more tissue there was. She was careful to avoid those. The light was from his flat screen, showing some sappy rom com. She and Jaime used to love them as teenagers but Cersei grew out of it. Jaime, however, still loved them for some reason, still hoping for his soulmate likely. The romantic idiot.

After sidestepping several things that probably contained a hundred diseases, Cersei was finally in front of the couch, finding her twin huddled in a blanket, asleep. His face was streaked with tears and snot. Judging from the bottles, he had been drinking. The one thing that Cersei will admit to herself that she and Tyrion had in common is their high alcohol tolerance. Jaime, unfortunately, did not get that trait. He always got drowsy after a few shots of the strongest alcohol. She’d seen the label of the beer around him. If their liver wouldn’t give out, she and Tyrion would still be fine drinking a crate of the stuff. One crate each.

Well, she checked up on him and he looks like shit but alive. Work here is done.

She was about to walk away when he stirred, his one arm, the arm with the hand, breaking free from the blanket and hanging off the side of the couch. He mumbled something under his breath before snoring loudly.

Cersei shook her head and took one step when she felt a hand grasp her wrist. She shrieked loudly. Her loud cry echoed throughout his empty living room. She looked down to find Jaime tugging at her wrist, whimpering out a name.

She whipped out a fan from her bag and started slapping his wrist with it.

“Let. Me. Go!” she punctuated each word with a slap. While she was no fan of his stump, who knows what kind of germs resided in his only hand?

It seemed to work because Jaime’s grip was loosening and his eyes were slowly blinking open.

“Who theh?” Jaime slurred.

“It’s Cersei, you dolt,” she snapped, causing her twin to groan.

Just then, footsteps pounded from outside and Gregor appeared in the threshold of the living room.

“It’s alright, Gregor. It was just a _pest_.” She glared pointedly at Jaime as she said that last word.

“What the fuck are you doing here with Gregor Clegane?” Jaime asked. His speech was becoming clearer despite the lack of sting in his tone. “You only need him if you—”

“Yeah. Yeah. I’m going to have someone fix your door tomorrow and the Imp sent me to check up on you. Now I did. Goodbye.”

She was walking away once more but as soon as she reached the threshold to join Clegane, a crash followed by loud cursing could be heard.

“Oh for fuck’s sake!” Cersei growled.

It wouldn’t do if Jaime would die. Even if she didn’t kill him, she’d be the primary suspect, being here. Father wouldn’t believe that he died out of his own stupidity. With a huff, she gestured Clegane to follow her. Jaime was sprawled on the floor in front of the couch, looking as if he had no will to get up.

“Gregor, please carry my brother and take him to his room,” she ordered.

She could hear Jaime’s muffled protests on the floor as the large man carried him. Gregor was tall, even much taller than Jaime and he already was a tall man. Gregor was also built like a tank which made him capable of carrying her brother like some delicate maiden. Although at that moment, he looked more like a kid. She couldn’t see him but she was certain that he was crossing his arms over his chest and pouting, since he was probably still too drunk to put up any sort of fight.

“I should really unregister you and Tyrion from the security system,” Jaime mumbled as they began climbing up his stairs.

“You’re welcome for not leaving you to die,” Cersei retorted. _I do a good deed and you snap at me?_

Thankfully, he was silent the rest of the way. When they arrived in his room (which was clean once she turned the lights on. Thank the Seven!), Gregor practically dumped him in his large bed and Cersei just had to snort at his complains of how he’s being treated like a sack of potatoes. He, then, glared at his ceiling. His face was still had dried tears and snot and Cersei’s motherly instincts couldn’t stand it. She produced a pack of wet wipes from her bag and took one. She roughly rubbed it in his face to wipe off the dried fluids. Jaime spluttered angrily and angled his head away from her.

“Don’t baby me!” he barked, slipping under the covers and pulling it over his head.

“Gods, Jaime. You’re the _CEO_ of the biggest company in Westeros but you look like you just lost your job.”

“Oh you’d love that wouldn’t you, Cers.”

His spitfire was returning, even if muffled by cloth. She knew what this was about. She had already been drunk by the time Jaime back to the bar. She didn't really know what happened exactly but she was certain he got rejected. Why he was this upset, for a whole week, about that... that... troll, Cersei wasn't sure. She really didn’t see why _she_  was worth crying about.

“Seriously, Jaime. There are plenty of other girls out there. Prettier, too.” At that, Jaime actually peeped out of the blankets to redirect his earlier glare at her. “Why are you wasting your time on _her_?”

Suddenly, Jaime’s face softened into dreamy expression.

“She’s… real. She’s not like those stupid women father throws at me. She actually fights back, not giving a shit about my name, but she’s not crazy either. And she has the most astonishing blue eyes I’ve ever seen.”

 _Blue eyes. Insults him._ That vaguely reminded him of their high school. Jaime had a crush on Catelyn Tully but thought he was leading her sister, Lysa, on, causing tears on both Lysa’s and Jaime’s end. While her twin was long over it already, Catelyn Tully—now Stark—still hates him until this day.

At least Catelyn had been somewhat pretty. Cersei met the _woman_ from last week up close. There was absolutely _nothing_ remarkable about her. Maybe except her ability to blush but it was more laughable than anything that’s an actual asset.

“If you liked her so much, why don’t you send our private investigator to find out more about her?”

Jaime’s eyes widened in disbelief. “I’m not like you, breaking into other people’s houses.”

Cersei scoffed. “I did call!”

He shook his head. “Regardless, that would be _stalking_ and she already thinks I’m too much. No need to make her more uncomfortable than she already is.”

She raised a brow. “Since when did that ever stop you from making other people uncomfortable?”

“I’m actually trying to send them a message that I’m not interested.”

“And _not_ even trying to pursue her is telling her _you’re_ interested?”

“Touché,” he resigned. “But it’s better than invading her privacy and being the bad guy. Maybe…” His eyes were shiny now, his nostrils were flaring, and his lips were wobbling. “… maybe we’re just not meant to be.”

A sob escaped from him and his nose was runny again. She got out her dry tissue and tossed it in his lap.

“You know what. Brood there for all I care. Tyrion should be home tomorrow night. He actually _wants_ to listen to your diva rants.” In her bag, she got out some medicine and placed it one his nightstand. “If for some reason you want to live, here’s some aspirin. You’ll have to get up from your big empty bed yourself for some water though.”

“Just leave,” he groaned.

“Gladly,” she replied, leaving with Gregor Clegane in tow.

…….

“ _Cersei, I have no idea how you did it but Jaime actually looks better than better._ ”

So, her twin decided to live after all and nobody had tried to murder or rob him while his door was still broken. She already sent someone to fix it first thing in the morning.

“I’m a mother, Tyrion,” she said a little too smugly over the phone. “I think I know how to handle _childishness_.”

“ _Oh like how you handled Joffrey?_ ” Tyrion said a little too innocently and she growled.

“He’s figuring things out,” she hissed in her eldest son’s defense. Her Joffrey just wanted to be recognized for being a smart, brilliant boy. He’s just being a troublemaker because he wants attention. Surely, the school and, especially, Tywin could see that.

“ _Can you believe my fucking luck?_ ” It was no longer Tyrion’s voice speaking into the phone. It sounded very much like her other brother. He sounded very much different from the miserable child the other night. “ _I made myself go to the gym in the morning. She was there!”_

“ _Whoa wait. Hold up_ ,” came Tyrion’s voice in the background. “ _It was a woman that got you brooding all week? You didn’t tell your sweet brother but you told the psycho?”_

“I heard that!” Cersei snapped.

“ _It’s a long story and you were busy at the time,_ ” Jaime told Tyrion. “ _Anyway, I was my usual charming self, challenging her to a boxing match._ ” Of course that’s how Jaime would think was charming. But that beast he liked looked more like a wrestler than boxer. “ _She didn’t even hold back because of my lack of hand. Most people hold back but she didn’t. She totally owned me but it was worth it to see her sapphire eyes light up like stars._ ”

“ _Oh hells. You’re comparing her eyes to stars and gemstones, brother. This is even worse than Catelyn, huh?_ ”

“ _Who cares about that sour fishwolf? That was years ago, Tyrion. There is a reason Brienne moved to my gym._ ” So, that was the beast’s name. “ _I’m going to get it right this time._ ”

“Well, this sibling bonding time has been fun but I have better things to do than to talk about my family’s love lives.” What were they? Thirteen-year-old girls? “Bye.”

Cersei ended the call and gulped down a whole glass of wine to soothe her nerves. She decided to open her InstaBran in hopes that the smiling faces of her children would also calm her down more.

Then, several photos on her feed sent her blood pressure rocketing sky high. Cersei quickly scrolled through her contacts and immediately dialed the number she was looking for.

“ _Hello, mom?_ ” a voice called from the other side.

“Myrcella Lannister-Baratheon! Just who is this boy I keep seeing you with in your InstaBran?”

“ _What boy?_ ” But Cersei could hear the squeak in her daughter’s voice.

“Don’t play innocent with me, LionSunspear5. Who. Is. This. Boy?”

“ _But that account is private. Mom! How did you—_ ”

“I’m a mother, honey. I have my ways.”


	4. The Fashion Maven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AlynnaStrong prompted: **Cersei passive-aggressively gives Brienne some sort of girly gift, like a dress or piece of delicate jewelry that she thinks will open Jaime’s eyes but causes him to wolf-out instead.**
> 
> Okay I'm not sure if I got wolf-out right in meaning but yeah well, I don't think anyone will complain if I got it wrong. hahahaha. Also, I suck at describing dresses.

What Cersei thought was an inconvenience to her actually bought her more amusement than she thought. Jaime’s _beast_ stood awkwardly in the middle of the room as the designer’s assistants got her measurements. Her large cow eyes kept darting to the door as if to flee and Cersei had to take a sip from her flask lest she laugh.

“Excuse me, Mrs. Baratheon,” the designer said and Cersei scowled, hearing her old married name. She was a Lannister. A _Lannister_! “Here are the selection of gowns you asked.”

She had to turn away from the girl being measured to look at the catalog of gowns to choose from. Jaime would have gladly done the task but Tywin insisted that Cersei do it, claiming it was _a woman’s task to worry about aesthetic things such as dresses._ Jaime, surprisingly resigned, seeming to trust his sister’s judgment. It was stupid anyway. You could dress that girl into the most expensive looking gown and she’d still look like a lumbering troll. Surely Jaime could see that. Cersei as honestly surprised that the only green about Jaime's face during their time together was the sparkle of his green eyes. Then again, Cersei doubted Jaime had seen her in a dress. The one time she’d seen her in a formal outfit, she wore a sort of blue tuxedo so it hardly counted. 

Out of spite for Tywin and showing Jaime that he can’t possibly see anything beautiful in that oaf, she quickly made her decision.

“I pick that one,” Cersei said and the tailor’s eyes widened.

“Truly? But—” the designer’s eyes looked to the wearer and Cersei knew what she was thinking.

“Oh never mind that.” Cersei waved away. It was the most expensive gown there, costing more than a million dragons, and to waste it to a woman such as _her_.

“Also, I already have a pair of shoes in mind. I will personally buy it for her,” Cersei added as the assistants were finished in taking her measurements. “Now get to work on this right away.”

“Yes, Mrs. Baratheon,” the designer replied, nodding her head.

“It’s _Lannister_ ,” Cersei hissed under her breath but they didn’t seem to hear because they scrambled to get out of the room.

Then, she heard a relieved sigh from behind her and turned to see the girl sagging in relief. She quickly stiffened though as soon as she noticed Cersei’s eyes were trained on her.

“How do you feel about stilettos?”

Much to Cersei’s great satisfaction, the beast seemed to pale even more, making her ugly freckles pop out.

…….

Lannister family dinners were awfully boring. But this year, Cersei quite enjoyed the addition of the presence of Jaime and his girlfriend, like a new entertainment or attraction in the party. The Lannister clan gawked at such an odd pairing with varying degrees of disgust, pity, or confusion, in their expressions. Tywin seemed slightly pissed off but said nothing of it.

The best reactions would have to be the pair themselves though. Jaime was as polite and courteous to her as ever but it was evident that he was uncomfortable. Brienne (because Jaime and Tyrion _and_ Tywin insisted she refer to the beast by name) looked even more so. The light pink fabric that did nothing to her skin tone appeared even more delicate on her large frame as well. The open chest and deep v of the neckline only emphasized her broad shoulders and flat chest. The tight sleeves emphasized her muscular arms. Overall, the tailors did their best but they couldn’t make it work. She was a sow in silk. To make it even worse, she towered over her date, even more so than usual. Cersei was genuinely surprised that she could still walk in a pair of stilettos, albeit not gracefully but Cersei didn’t even think she could walk in those without support. But the fact of the matter was that she was a sight for sore eyes.

Judging from Jaime’s expression, he saw that, too.

The dinner flew by quickly and everyone retired to their assigned bedrooms. Cersei had just checked up on the kids who insisted on having a sleepover with their cousins. Joffrey even said he’d stay with them. _My sweet boy being a responsible older brother to his siblings_.

She was making her way back to her room when a door she just passed by thumped loudly.

“Fuck, Brienne. You look _awful_ in that dress,” a voice from the door said and Cersei smiled, knowing clearly who had said that.

But her smirk was short lived when she heard the next words. “It’s a good thing I already don’t like you with any clothes on.” And a long horrifying ripping sound followed.

“Jaime! That dress was more than a million dragons!” the beast shrieked what had been in Cersei’s mind.

“Paid for by Tywin Lannister who has more money than he knows what to do with,” Jaime replied without a care. “But I do like the shoes though. Gods! I never thought your legs would get any longer but I was mistaken.”

“S-so you’re not embarrassed that I was taller than you?” The woman sounded meek. Cersei thought she actually sounded like a girl.

“Fuck no!” came Jaime’s protests.

“But at dinner you seemed so…” _Ah, so she noticed it, too_.

“Uncomfortable? Well, I do think that was a stupid dress choice. It’s just like Cersei to pick an expensive dress. I shouldn’t have allowed father to let her pick. She couldn’t even get the color right. You should always wear blue.”

“She did buy me the shoes herself though.”

“Let us thank the gods Cersei didn’t _completely_ ruin your outfit. But Brienne, I was uncomfortable because while that dress did look like shit on you, that deep v-neck was making me uncomfortable.”

“Y-you mean?”

“I was kind of getting a boner. Hence my constant trips to the bathroom. I would have taken you along but I was afraid I’d rip your stupid dress before this dinner could finish.” _What._ Cersei did notice that he was disappearing from the party quite frequently. But she thought he was puking or something. “But enough about that. I want those thighs wrapped around me tonight and don’t lose the shoes. Please?”

“Yes,” she moaned greedily.

And that was Cersei’s cue to flee. More disturbed and more confused than ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got the chapter title from urban dictionary.
> 
> "fashion maven:  
> Someone in the know about all things fashion; Someone with people look up to for their fashion sense and expertise;"
> 
> *flies away laughing like a maniac*


	5. The Bridesmaid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gayya prompted: maybe about Cersei with Bronn just for guilty pleasure fot both of them xD
> 
> I did have this chapter idea in mind when I decided to make it as a series but gayya's prompt was what led me to let it go on its own course and actually write it. I think I had way too much amusement writing this chapter. XD

The sept was decorated in whites and blues and silver. Cersei was sure their father was going to have a stroke. Red and gold had always been the colors of a Lannister but Jaime always liked rebelling against their father in little ways like that. Even when Cersei had married, the sept was decorated in rich Lannister colors. The bastard Robert hadn’t complained then and she had been too naïve to see that his approval was nothing more than laziness on his part.

Cersei’s hands were itching for a drink but Jaime was strict about no alcohol during the ceremony. He, at least, assured her that there was going to be booze at the reception.

But the ceremony hasn’t even begun yet and the sept was stifling. She was seated just behind where the bridesmaids should be and though empty, it didn’t stop the heat from the already many guests.

Fifteen minutes passed and Cersei was dying. Perhaps the bride had run off, realized that a Lannister was too good for her. Perhaps, it was Jaime who got cold feet and he finally snapped from whatever spell his beast fiancée cast on him. What Cersei thought about a lot more though was if they could still have the reception despite the fact that the wedding was cancelled. It would be a shame to waste all the food being paid for.

She was suddenly pulled out from her thoughts when she was literally being pulled from her seat. Cersei had sat at the far end of the row, away from the aisle. She was surprised to find Bronn, one of the groomsmen, being behind this.

“Don’t manhandle me, you filth,” Cersei hissed and Bronn gave her an infuriating smirk.

“I have orders from the groom, _your Grace._ ” If it were possible his smirk went even darker. “And I remember clearly you like being manhandled.”

Cersei shuddered at the memories and she quickly willed those away. She did _not_ wanna think about that. Instead, she focused on where she was being taken to. They were headed to the back of the sept and there she found her twin pacing.

“Oh good you’re here,” he said with relief in his face once he spotted her. “Maragery Tyrell just called and said she couldn’t make it,”

Cersei roughly yanked her arm away from Bronn’s clutches and crossed her arms.

“And that matters to me why?”

Jaime rolled his eyes as if she was the stupid one.

“I need you to be in Margaery Tyrell’s place.”

“W-what?” Cersei spluttered. Jaime and his fiancée had offered for her to be one of the bridesmaids but she had adamantly refused. She did not even want to attend but appearances greatly mattered. Wasn’t her mere reluctant presence enough? “And just who will I be paired with?”

“You’re stuck with me, your Grace,” her earlier captor spoke and Cersei couldn’t escape the loud groan.

But before Cersei could even reply, a voice piped in. “Oh thank the Seven!” She barely had time to register Sansa Stark’s identity before being dragged away to the nearest bathroom.

…….

As per tradition, there were six bridesmaids in line—Myrcella Baretheon, Amerei Frey, Jeyne Darry, Desmera Redwyne, Arya Stark, and Cersei. They were headed by the maid-of-honor, Sansa Stark. The groomsmen, led by the best man, Tyrion, had six opposite the six women well—Addam Marbrand, Lancel Lannister, Cleos Frey, Daven Lannister, Gendry Waters, and Bronn. The women and men locked arms as the ceremony began.

“Cheer up, your Grace,” Bronn joked beside her as Arya and her partner walked off. “You at least get to watch your brother be an idiot.”

Cersei scowled in reply. She did not want to be there. She wanted to go home and drink. Cersei probably would have attacked the Stark girl earlier and made a run for it but one of the bridesmaids was her own daughter, who had flown from Dorne for the marriage.

And now she’s walking down the aisle arm-in-arm with Jaime’s driver of all people. She wished she was paired with Addam Marbrand but she’d rather Myrcella have him than Cersei’s current partner. She certainly would _not_ pair herself with Tyrion either. The rest of the men were their cousins—Lancel, Daven, and Cleos—save for Arya Stark’s partner who looked suspiciously like Robert and she does _not_ want to partner herself with another Robert. The younger Stark girl seemed very possessive of him anyway.

Her dress was short… and tight. Myrcella had given her the opportunity for an out once they realized that Margaery had a smaller frame but the seven be damned if she was going to back away because the stupid rose’s dress didn’t fit her. Cersei sucked it in while Sansa and Myrcella joined forces in closing the zipper in her dress.

With that knowledge, Cersei straightened herself to prove that she could still rock a dress intended for a smaller woman.

One could imagine the relief when she and Bronn split and she had to sit with the other bridesmaids.

…….

The ceremony took longer than she thought. The groom was very handsy with the bride. As amusing as it was to watch the septon cringe or falter when Jaime randomly decided to kiss the _she-hulk_ , she wanted to go to the reception so badly.

…….

“With this kiss I pledge my love.”

Even beautiful couples didn’t kiss that long during their wedding vows and Cersei’s groan echoed throughout the sept.

…….

It was time for the bridesmaids and groomsmen to have a picture with the newlywed couple.

“Keep your hands to yourself,” Cersei warned Bronn who only gave her an eyeroll. Thankfully, he did as told and rested his _grimy_ _peasant_ hands on her waist.

“ _Oh please_ , your Grace. Your ass is not as firm as they were back then.”

Just after, he said that, the cameraman ordered them to smile so she forced one upon her face.

“You take that back!” she hissed through her smiling teeth.

“Face it, you’re getting fucking old.”

“Shut up!”

…….

Once Cersei’s breathing finally slowed, she sat up, the blanket spilling down her body and revealing her naked breasts. She scooted to the edge of the bed to where a nightstand stood. A wine bottle and glass of unfinished wine sat atop it. She gulped down the whole glass of wine. She needed it badly after what she’d just done.

The bed stirred and there was a moan of relief behind her before it spoke gruffly. “So glad we ditched the fucking reception before the bullshit after dinner stuff happened. As if Mr. and Mrs. Lannister would care if we’re gone anyway.”

She gave a noncommittal answer before downing another glass.

“I’ll admit,” the voice said gruffly. “You’re a better lay now than you were years ago.

Cersei looked back to see Bronn turning to his side.

“Still think my ass is saggy?” she retorted.

“Yeah but you’re a good fuck. I suppose you’ve learned from your many, many lovers.”

“Who doesn’t want to fuck the Golden Lannister girl?” she shot back, filling her glass once more and taking more careful sips.

Bronn chuckled in that annoying way of his. “You may have had many lovers but woman, I can tell wine is your true love.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bronn has spoken. CerseiXWine is true love.


	6. The Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been 84 years since I updated this thing. lol.

Even the expensive office walls couldn’t block out the loud cheer outside Cersei’s office. She had been taking a break, sipping wine from her golden flask, and the yell startled her, nearly spilling the contents of her flask on her blouse.

She opened the door to give that hooligan a piece of her mind when she was startled by Jaime’s presence, about to knock on her door. He had a stupid grin plastered on his face.

“Brienne finally agreed to a date!” he said excitedly. “Isn’t that great!”

“Yay,” she deadpanned. Cersei couldn’t care less. Tywin didn’t like the girl much, despite the fact that her family owned a resort in the Sapphire Isle. Dating didn’t mean married with children either. Tywin thought it was only a ploy of Jaime’s to get back at him for those awful women he set him up with and Cersei mentally agreed. She did _not_ see a future where his brother and that ‘woman’ head to the aisle and then the delivery room of a hospital.

“So, uhm… she said she was bringing a friend with her.”

Cersei snorted. “How sad. You weren’t her date after all?”

“No! I just…” He was scratching his head shyly, which was uncharacteristic for a Lannister. They are proud lions. Jaime looked more like one of Tommen’s kittens. “She’s still a little awkward and I didn’t want her uncomfortable and shit so I may have agreed she bring a friend so I have to bring one, too. He’s a dude who swings both ways but Bronn and Tyrion are straight so I don’t know who else to ask.”

“What do I get out of this?” she asked, and Jaime smirked.

“He’s actually rich and famous, sister. So much better than the nobodies you screw in your office.”

“I’m listening.” She gestured him to go on while sipping her wine.

“It’s a surprise. But I _promise_ you, you will like him.”

…….

**_Hotpie’s_ **

When Cersei saw the restaurant, her mood immediately dampened. It wasn’t a fastfood or a diner at least but still, she wouldn’t even put it in the top twenty… or fifty restaurants she would dine in. The classical style façade could not cover up the fact that this place was unbeknownst to people with her social status and if she doesn’t know of this place, it was not really worth her time. It was small, too, as if trying to tuck itself in a corner.

Why couldn’t have Jaime picked a better place? Sure, it had only been a few days since her brother’s ‘date’ said yes and one needed to take a reservation _months_ before but Jaime should’ve made use of his Lannister name to reserve a table. Gods, he really was the stupidest Lannister anyway.

Suddenly, this made Cersei not too optimistic about her date if he agreed to a dump like this. She wanted to bolt.

“Nope. You’re not leaving,” Jaime said, yanking her elbow and dragging her inside the restaurant. Annoyingly, he was strong. If she weren’t a lady, she’d scream protests. No way was she losing her cool in a no-name place like this. “I know you don’t like being seen in places with _no significance to our social status_ but I have tried this place before and the food is good.” Cersei rolled her eyes. Her brother was a bit of a foodie, which is such a waste of time. “And if you don’t like the food, I promise you’ll like your date. Anyway, that should be them right there.” Jaime gestured to the main doors. They were frosted glass that obscured the outside but she could make out a tall mannish figure getting out of a car. Only Jaime’s beast would be that tall. There was another figure who held her hand momentarily.

As Jaime’s date entered, Cersei was _this_ close to abandoning her brother but then her date entered and her breath was taken away.

“Cersei Lannister, the tabloids don’t do you justice,” her date said, taking her hand delicately and kissing it. “You’re even more beautiful in person.”

Cersei found herself blushing as his grip lingered longer than necessary before releasing it.

“You’re quite dashing yourself, Mr. Martell,” she retorted.

“Please. Call me Oberyn. I think we’ll get on quite nicely tonight.”

Oh they definitely will. Oberyn Martell was handsome and charming and his dark eyes didn’t mask his want despite his gentlemanly façade, but that wasn’t what made Cersei giddy though. The Martells produced the _best_ Dornish Red in the country.

“Wench, you look as beautiful as my bay mare!”

And of course, her brother had no tact at all. She’d seen him charm women to aid in sealing business deals but he only flirted enough without leading them on. The only times he took them to bed was when father tried getting him into a more stable relationship but those occasional moments only lasted about a week or two at most before Jaime finds some way to ruin the relationship. This ugly beast must have been either formidable or that blinded with his looks to withstand his verbal onslaught when prettier and more petite women couldn’t.

“Shut up, Lannister!” the woman hissed back.

“I’ll have you know, Oath is very beautiful. I’ll introduce you when I show you around the estate. Now, come.”

Jaime held her hand and eagerly pulled her to their assigned table. Oberyn took her hand as well and they walked as how people in their standing should and not like a little kid in a fastfood joint just as her brother had just done.”

……

Because Brienne was still not ready to sit next to Jaime, she sat next to Cersei. Across the rectangular table were their respective dates. The waiter was thorough in taking orders, kept repeating and making sure he got their orders right several times. Likely it was knowing very well the occupants of the table and not wanting to mess up. Thankfully, when he finally finished, he was quick to leave them alone to talk amongst themselves. Normally, Cersei would comment about the beast's mannishness or the fact that she wore a black suit instead of a dress for the date but she was too busy charming Oberyn to do so.

“The red and gold suits you, Cersei. It shows the fire in your spirit, burning like a thousand suns,” Oberyn said in a low, silky voice. Every tone and word intent on her seduction. Cersei was about to retort something equally sexy when a commotion beside her distracted her.

“Did you ever even have a girlfriend or are women just stupid enough to fall for the flashing of your pretty white teeth at people?”

“I had and no they aren’t but I think you are because you’re still with me.”

“Jaime, commenting on your date’s fashion choices isn’t what one would call romantic.”

“Wench, it’s called honesty and I know that from me, it gets you all hot and bothered because your honesty does the same to me. And trust me, the blue inside shirt is the only thing that suits you. You should wear blue often. Black just makes you look more like a man. Burn that.”

“Oh _geez_ , Jaime. Let me just take off my clothes right now and go find a fireplace to burn my clothes in.”

“Go do that, darling. I’m going to watch. Maybe even follow your footsteps.”

“Oh you’re incorrigible.”

“One of my many charms, sweetling.”

“Should I list down all the nicknames you’re giving me?”

“Nah. Wench is my favorite. It makes me feel like I’m a knight from the medieval era.”

“No, Jaime. It makes you sound like a rowdy sellsword.”

Thankfully, the appetizers arrived before they could continue any further because Cersei was about to blow a fuse.

“You should try the dip, little wildfire,” Oberyn purred, holding out a garlic bread with red sauce at the end. “It’s made of sixteen Dornish spices. Though I doubt this could beat mine back home.”

She flashed him one of her carefully practiced smiles and bit a tiny portion, just as how etiquette school would allow her.

Cersei’s whole mouth was on fire and wanted to dive into a pool of milk. Instead, she chewed carefully before swallowing the flaming fireball down her throat. When Oberyn’s attention was in his garlic bread, she gulped down a mouthful of water to soothe her burning throat.

After finishing the whole flask, she huffed out in relief, only just noticing Oberyn look at her.

“This is actually surprisingly good. Would you like another—”

“NO!” Cersei said too vehemently and to her annoyance, Oberyn chuckled as he slathered his garlic stick with more dip and bit a huge chunk from the spice-soaked good.

When Oberyn wasn't paying attention once more, Cersei grabbed a passing waiter and grabbed the pitcher he was carrying. It took all she had to pour the water in her glass and  _not_ just drink it straight from the pitcher. The waiter tried to pick up the pitcher but Cersei glared at him. The waiter scurried away. She caught Oberyn staring at her in amusement and she smiled back to try and alleviate her mood, but her brother and his date were at it again.

“Jaime! I can feed myself just fine.”

“Come on, Brienne! Let me do cute date stuff. Girls would usually kill for that.”

“First of all, you haven’t washed your hands since you got here. Second of all, I’m not like most girls, if you can tell.”

Jaime huffed. “So, I haven’t unlocked that level to feed you but you let me touch your waist already.”

“It was to help position myself for the exercise. You should know that it’s just… gym stuff.”

“Gym stuff didn’t stop me from getting a boner.”

“Seriously?”

“Why did you think I had to shower too often?” Jaime said too loudly and Cersei just had to scold him.

“Would you _shut up_?” she hissed. At least his date had the decency to be embarrassed. Her own brother merely glared at her. “Just because you picked _this_ place, does not mean you should act out of decorum!”

“Calm down, my little wildfire,” Oberyn said soothingly… at least tried to. He even held her hand, but Cersei was not one to be easily placated. “Save your passions for other matters.” Oberyn’s eyes smoldered and Cersei had to admit that he _did_ have a bit of an effect on her.

She was saved from his spell when the waiter arrived with their orders. Cersei ordered filleted fish while Oberyn ordered something that was sizzling and undoubtedly drenched in spices. It was quite an overpowering scent. But the steaks beside her was still able to assault her nose. Both her brother and his date ordered the same thing.

“Told ‘ya we’re soulmates, honey,” Jaime teased his date, winking.

She responded by rolling her eyes. “Oh shut up and eat your steak.”

And that was the end of that… for the time being. Cersei hated to admit it but the food was good and judging from everyone else, they probably liked it as well since they ate in silence. Cersei tried her very best not to just gobble her food up because she was a lady.

Of course the peace was destroyed once more by the table shuddering a bit.

“I was cutting my meat just fine, Brienne.”

“You have one hand. That’s a fact you can’t change, unless your father was rich enough to fund scientists to let engineer you a new functioning hand.”

“Actually, he is a major sponsor in the development of prosthetics for the disabled,” Jaime boasted and Cersei can’t help but feel a little proud that he's actually using his family name for once...even if it's something as petty as their bickering.

“Yeah, but your prosthetic doesn’t function either. It’s just decoration. Unless you get a prosthetic with a fork attached to it then either let me help you or starve.”

The table suddenly grew tense and Cersei was gleefully waiting for this relationship to be over before it even began.

But then Jaime beamed.

“That… actually is a great idea. Thanks, wench!”

He slid his plate a little toward his date and Cersei watched as she stabbed the steak with her fork while Jaime sawed through it. She looked at Oberyn helplessly and he understood.

“I think Cersei and I will skip dessert. We want to acquaint ourselves more privately.”

Cersei nearly snorted at the identical disgusted faces the two sported at Oberyn’s words. The Dornish held out his hand and Cersei took it. They gracefully stood up and exited.

Even as she was leaving, Jaime and his beast are still ‘fighting’.

“Okay, Brienne. I get it. No handholding. We take this slow. Now will you _please_ put down that table knife?”

…….

“Good morning, sweet sister!” greeted Tyrion in a pitch that sounded too high. She was certain he was doing this on purpose. She had just arrived at the office and her hangover demanded she sit down _immediately_. Cersei had barked at some employee to offer his chair and he'd scrambled away somewhere. Just her luck, Tyrion passed by. He knew very well she'd never willingly stay in the  _peasant area_ for long.

“Oh fuck off!” Cersei growled, which only seemed to encourage the midget’s annoyance via laughter.

“I know we Lannisters have a large tolerance for alcohol but who knew one of our best would be felled.”

Cersei wanted to snap her little brother’s head off but he spoke again.

“Jaime sure looks chipper today though,” Tyrion commented.

Cersei was a bit confused because she had been looking for him and the receptionist said that he hadn't logged in yet but then he waltzed in the room.

“Good morning, everyone!” Jaime exclaimed which made Cersei’s ears ring. “Forgive my tardiness!” And to torture her ears more, he proceeded to greet each and every one of their employees. When he arrived at where Cersei and Tyrion were, his voice seemed even higher than ever.

“Why are you late? Did you get laid?” Cersei snapped but Jaime only smiled. Usually, he’d be equally snappy at her sourness but there was only a genuine smile—not a smirk—on his face.

“Someone had fun at Oberyn’s. Was his paramour there? You had a threesome, didn’t you?” Jaime teased.

“Bet she drank his whole wine cellar,” Tyrion retorted.

Cersei was not telling them that both had happened.

“Well why aren’t you sore, lover boy?” she snapped. “You’re just as late as I am and you’re not having a hangover.” Jaime who grinned even wider.

“I promised Brienne slow and I honor my oaths,” he said proudly, making Tyrion and Cersei roll their eyes simultaneously. “But she did allow me to walk her to her apartment door. She even let me hold her hand!”

Jaime looked so pathetically happy it irritated her.

“Why the hell are you late then?” she snapped.

“Calm down, banshee,” Tyrion said. “I’m sorry Oberyn doesn’t want you anywhere near the Martell’s supply of Dornish red.”

She wasn’t about to tell him that Oberyn had indeed rejected her proposal of a marital alliance. At least, he and his… lover had been a good fuck. Or at least Cersei thought they were. She wasn’t sure. The only thing she was certain of that night was the good wine.

“So, Jaime, why are you late?” Tyrion asked calmly but not without a hint of mischief sparkling in his mismatched eyes.

“I just couldn’t sleep thinking about how shy Brienne looked and how her hands felt against mine,” Jaime sighed dreamily.

Cersei and Tyrion barely got along but they couldn’t help but groan because of how much of a romantic teenage girl their brother is.

**Author's Note:**

> As I mentioned earlier, if you have an idea related to the theme of this fic, you can leave me a prompt. I'm still nooby mcnooby but I'll still try my best.
> 
> Also, since this is going to be by prompt, I doubt this will be in any order or whatsoever so feel free to prompt something that probably happened in a timeline before the latest update. :D
> 
> Sequences:  
> 01- The Wingman  
> 05- The Chauffeur  
> 02- The Mother  
> 04- The Fashion Maven  
> 06- The Bridesmaid  
> 03- The Date


End file.
